Sunday, March 24, 2013

What to DO While You Wait???


Many times, I have heard girls ask what they are supposed to do while they are waiting for the Lord to bring the right young man into their lives. Questions like "But what will I do, spending all day at home? What are you supposed to do, if you choose to not go to College? Can't I better serve God by getting a degree? But what if _________________ happens???" So many times I have heard phrases like "You must have a lot of free time, right???" haha! I wish!!! ;) People, just don't have a clue, do they?

My advice is this: use this time of singleness to actively prepare for your future. Stay at home. Serve your parents & siblings. Learn everything you can, from home. Read profusely (non-fiction, of course!), on all beneficial subjects. Do the mundane, everyday, so- called "boring" tasks that no one else wants to do. Learn a new skill, that will bless your family. Serve your family, Church body & the community. Learn more than just how to cook, clean, budget, balance a checkbook, decorate, teach school, do laundry, garden & sew. That is the bare minimum. Walk with integrity. Strengthen your faith. Ask God to purify your character. Go above & beyond what is expected or required (Do Hard Things #2). Do everything you can now to learn how to be a good wife & mother. And above all, do it with a happy heart.

"A joyful heart is good medicine,
    but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."
- Proverbs 17:22

I say this, speaking from experience. I am to be married to the man of my dreams in 5 short months & there is SO much to do, learn & prepare. I feel ill- prepared. If I could go back & do things over, there is SO much I would change & do differently, to be more prepared to better serve my husband! Speaking from experience, do NOT waste this time of singleness. Because you can't get back this season of your life!

I am reminded of the Apostle Paul's advice in 1 Corinthians 7 (especially verses 32-34), about how a single person is able to use this time to serve the Lord & her or her family, while a married person is primarily preoccupied with serving his or her spouse. Use this time of singleness to best serve the Lord & your family, to learn & to prepare!

Another thing us girls can do is to pray for our future husbands now, even if you might not know who he is yet. Ask the Lord to bless him mightily, to increase his faith, to strengthen his character, to teach him how to lead your family, that God would give him a multi-generational Vision, that He would teach you how to be a good helpmate & wife to him, that the two of you might raise a godly family, walking in His Ways.

"I continually bring to mind the fact that I will not be single
forever & I do not want to waste this time as a single! There is no
other season in life like it, when it's just me & the Lord!...
Another thing I do is to pray & ask the Lord what specifically my
future husband needs me to pray for right now, in this moment.
Even though I don't know him, God does, & I want to pray very
intentionally for him. Sometimes I hear very specific things &
sometimes I don't, so I just pray about more general things for him.
Either way, mountains get moved in the spirit."
- When God Writes Your Love Story, testimony by Lauren (age 24)

You can also use this time of singleness to practice being a wife & mother, by serving your parents & siblings. "The habits you form now & how you treat your family now will have a direct impact on how you will treat your own husband & children someday." That can be a scary thought!

You can also serve your future husband now by closely watching how you interact with other men, whether they be fathers, brothers, friends, your Pastor, strangers or acquaintances. You do not want to cultivate habits of flirtatiousness, immodesty, disrespect, dishonor, flightiness etc now (& thus gaining that kind of reputation), if you do not plan on acting like that once you are married.

Faithfulness is a discipline that is refined & honed through years of practice. It is developing a habit of loving your future husband through patiently waiting, consistently hoping & living by the high standard to which you've been Called. It is strength learned through persevering; integrity gained through waiting.

I am reminded of the Proverbs 31 woman, who "does her husband good ALL the days of her life," (verse 12), not just after she has met him, or once they are married. There are good habits, character traits etc to be cultivated & practiced now, in preparation for the "someday," when we are married, the good Lord willing.

And, we must remember that not all people are Called to marry. Some strong Christians remain single their entire lives, married to their Eternal, Heavenly Bridegroom, instead of an earthly husband. Marriage is not the end- all goal of life. The goal of life is Christ-likeness. Marriage is just one of the means of achieving that.

Remember Who it is that you are working for. We are working for the Lord, seeking to honor Him (& not man) in our activities, educational pursuits, hobbies, pastimes, decisions about the future, how we use our time etc. We are not required to compete with (nor report to) society, the culture, the world etc as to how we spend our single years. We are Called to something better than that!!! :)

 "And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything
in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father
through Him.
.. Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord & not for men..."
- Colossians 3:17, 23

Do not waste away your life, simply dreaming of & longing for "that blissful state." Instead, be active while you wait! :)

Persevero, my friends!

Read Part I of this series here- "Waiting for God to Write Your Love Story"

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Related blog posts to read-

Don't Waste Your Life (January 2013)
Guard Your Heart
(October 2012)
Surrendering Our Precious Dreams to God (September 2012)
Fully Surrendering Our Dreams to God (July 2012)
Walk with the Wise (July 2012)
Are You a Woman That a Man Would Die For? (July 2012)
All For the Glory of God (July 2012)
A Multi-Generational Vision
(July 2012)

Why Modesty? Part I (May 2012)
What Is "True Modesty"? Part II
(May 2012)
Contentment (May 2012)
Goals (April 2012)
God First! (Priorities)
(March 2012)
Do Not Give Up! (March 2012)
The Rubber Meets the Road (February 2012)
Contentment (Waiting on God) (November 2011)
Surrendering Yourself to God (November 2011)
Obeying the Voice of God (November 2011)
Do Hard Things! (October 2011)
Only What's Done For Christ Will Last (September 2011)
The Tragedy of a Wasted Life (August 2011)

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